I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
