no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize