I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
