Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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