Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
