Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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