what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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