i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
