No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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