He kissed a someone with a penis
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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