I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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