Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
