last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
His hands were made for my vagina.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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