If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
