Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
