i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
