so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
love makes seman taste better
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
