What did we do last night that was yellow?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
