Swine flu. Run for my life!
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize