I must be too annoying 4 u.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize