So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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