I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
