Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
