Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
She's JV to your varsity
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
