I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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