What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
