is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Randomize