Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
