So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
