dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
