and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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