Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
