I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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