HIV tests are more positive than that guy
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
