I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
