with your own penis?
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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