I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
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