god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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