Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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