i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Fuck appropriateness.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
