Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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