So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
