how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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