i need an iv and a liver transplant
I feel great
I just peed on a car
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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