so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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