Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
