But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I will pee on everything he values.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Randomize
