I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize