It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
