Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
