I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
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